Objective:

To analyze the different ways of 'being a family' and that predomínate in different social contexts ranging from rural to urban spaces based on the reasons that support the decision to have children.

Materials and methods:

A qualitative study was designed and analyzed using case studies of different health areas of northern Portugal. The methodology used was based on semi-structured interviews with 50 pregnant women. It was done a content analysis of interviews.

Results:

Based on the stories obtained through interviews, we identified the category "reference model of family ", in which two subcategories listed was identified: “the dream of building a new family” and “the dream come true”. These results match the idea of aspirations (initial ideal) and representations (abstract ideal). The results suggest a family oriented by ideals and show a decrease in the number of children per woman. This is the result of a perception of the associated costs of this decision.

Conclusions:

From the universe of aspirations centered in the desire for children, only a few women prefer a life without children. However, we identified a dissonance between the initial aspirations and the practices. It is concluded that there is a process of choice between having children, as well as the transition to parenthood as a conjugal project.